✍️ I Never Lose. I Either Win, Or I Learn ✍️ — April 24
Dealing with job rejection; 518 new jobs across the U.S., UK, Canada and Europe
Hello folks, happy Monday! Hope we all had lovely weekends and are ready to get back on that grind.
Last week we dove into some of the ways I landed my jobs and internships at the likes of The Guardian, Wall Street Journal, Bloomberg and FiveThirtyEight. We covered when to start your job search, how to reach out to prospective employers, and how to tackle the actual application.
One thing we didn’t cover was when we don’t land the job. Rejection can be one of the harshest realities, not only with our careers but also in life. It’s completely inevitable, and if we can become even 10% easier with the negative feelings it brings, we’ll unlock so many doors for ourselves. So today we’ll dive into how I learned to deal with rejection and use it to my advantage.
Been rejected in your career? Of course you have. How did you deal with it? Share with me and others below.
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🚨 Featured Postings 🚨
Politico Europe
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Contract: Full-Time
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Deadline: Rolling
Preview of New Jobs in the UK 🇬🇧
“I never lose. I either win, or I learn”.
The above quote by Nelson Mandela is incredibly powerful, especially from someone who went through so much adversity in his life. Rejection isn’t easy, it shouldn’t be. If we add up all the times we’ve been told no versus yes, we’ve likely been denied far more than we’ve succeeded, so we should probably focus more on the former than the latter. Instead of running away from the truth, over time we can become more comfortable with the uncomfortable emotions to unlock a whole new world of productivity.
The science behind rejection is fascinating and illuminating. Any time we’re told no, we experience an emotional wound not too dissimilar from the physical pain of, say, a kick in the shin or some other injury. That’s because the anterior cingulate cortex — the part of the brain that responds to pain — is activated whenever we experience rejection. There are many types of rejection, most of which are based on social situations, because we are highly social animals who thrive on connection and approval.
I’ve been passed on from so many jobs in my life that it’s just become part of my process. Do I enjoy it? No, I’m not a sociopath. But I realize job applications are very different to that of a group of friends or a romantic relationship.
Unlike social contexts, job applications are more black and white. In most circumstances, we don’t know the recruiter and we are likely one of hundreds of other candidates applying for the same position. As I mentioned last week, many organizations will painstakingly tick a box for every line of the job criteria you meet, and often won’t even know your name.
No Doesn’t Mean Forever, It Means Not Yet
In February, 2017, I received an automated email from The Washington Post informing me I hadn’t made it onto its summer graphics internship shortlist. The email was one of many similar notifications I’d received in recent weeks, each telling me I hadn’t made the cut. I was 0 for 7 and knew something had to change.
The reality is that there is always a reason behind why we don’t land a new job or promotion. I could have easily ran away from this truth and just accepted that I wasn’t good enough to succeed. Even worse, I could’ve doubled down and told myself I wasn’t to blame and it was actually the newsrooms who were bonkers for not hiring me.
That’s when I decided to ask the source itself. I emailed Kat Downs Mulder, who was then the Post’s Director of Graphics, and asked her point-blank what I was missing in my candidacy. To my delight, Kat filled an entire page telling me exactly what she wanted in her interns, where I needed to improve, and that she expected to see my name again next semester. I printed the email off, stuck it to my bedroom wall and read it multiple times a day. Running on feel-good momentum, I emailed the other newsrooms that said no and received another handful of replies, all with feedback on where I should focus. I printed those out as well, forming a mini jigsaw.
From there, I spent the next semester sharpening my tools and filling the gaps. And it worked. That same summer I was supposed to be on the Post’s graphics desk, I landed an internship at Bloomberg News, forcing the door down to become their first Data Visualization Intern. I was only 25, so naturally I thought I’d solved all of my problems and was on a fast track to a desk next to Mr. Bloomberg himself.
For 10 weeks I worked like a horse, clocking an average of 60 hours a week — if my graphics skills weren’t enough, I’d nail the job with effort. What happened? The internship coordinator called me into his office and delivered a cold, hard no. “Couldn’t find the space for you” he said, staring chillingly into my eyes, devoid of empathy or any emotion at all, as he watched me process the information.
That moment was as horrible as it sounds. But it was also the day I realized I had to toughen up if I was going to survive in this business, and in life in general. Granted, delivering bad news is a frequent part of a recruiter’s job and isn’t fun. But if it was seemingly that easy for someone to smash another person’s dreams to pieces, I knew I had to take as much emotion out of being on the receiving end as possible.
How To Ask For Feedback
Asking for feedback sounds simple, but when you’re emotionally on fire it suddenly becomes paralyzingly difficult. For me the best time to ask for feedback is immediately after you receive the notification. It helps me deal with the emotion by knowing I’ve already done something about it.
Here’s an email I sent to a company a couple of years ago asking for feedback for a role I didn’t get. Use it as a template, tweak it to the specific role, and make a habit of asking for feedback immediately and often.
“Dear Xxxx,
Hope you're well.
My name's Daniel Levitt and I recently received a message saying I wasn't successful in my application for the xxxx opening.
I imagine you're incredibly busy, but would it be okay to receive some feedback on my application? It's still very much my intention to work for Xxxx in the future, so any feedback on where I can improve my skills and experience would be greatly appreciated. I'll still be reading the newspaper from afar in the meantime.
All the very best,
Daniel”
That’s all from me today. Thank you so much for making it all the way to the bottom! If you have a topic you’d like me to cover, drop me a comment below. 👍